Plunging into a committed relationship is no more an option you are considering when shopping!
You have come this far and are on the precipice of diving. The decision is going to make or break your life for good because you will have to live with it.
Make sure that you have covered base and are sure of the person with whom you have decided to share the rest of your life. I am an overthinker, and I think a lot before I do something or say something to someone. I'm sure most people do the same, but what good is it for if it is not put to some better use?
Here is a list of things that you should actually think before you take that big leap of faith and get into a relationship.
Don't hesitate to explore your fears or express doubts. Be absolutely open. Be it past relations, income, family, friends physical or emotional aspects, inclinations, preferences, and anything else you feel you need to know, just go ahead and talk about it. Everything under the sun, right from money matters, to career paths, to the place of stay, family bonds, ideational and emotional issues, just about everything has to be discussed.
Often, you end up not asking because you like to presume certain aspects of the person and delude ourselves into believing that all is fine because you don't want the relationship to end.
Spend time together talking about mutual or individual goals, views about mundane and not so mundane issues. Take up a topic and go all out to air, out your views and get his/her views or opinions. You want to avoid discovering things later and regretting, "I wish I knew."
Going to movies, parties, wine and dine evenings and posting pictures on social media may be exciting but that is not going to help. In fact, the pressure of flaunting yourself as a couple will come in the way of getting to know each other better.
Don't jump the bandwagon and become popcorn munching and soft drink consuming crowd at the movies. Watching movies together hand in hand is certainly romantic but will not help to solve existential issues. Do that while you want to but also do spend time walking and talking together.
Discard that phone. You are considering spending the rest of your life with another living person. Don't be a cell phone zombie!
Appreciate, acknowledge, accept the facts that you know about each other and be completely honest. You would like to welcome the other person into your life with his/her past, shortcomings and all other attributes that are either positive or negative. Just make sure you both know clearly what each one is about and where and how you would like the relationship to shape or go forward.
Rather, understand the differences and agree to disagree while continuing the warmth of the relationship.
Don't be carried away about the romance or let the hormones hijack your intelligence. Enjoy the feel-good factor but take time to spend and rationalize your thoughts alone. Analyze, write down your expectations and fears and make sure you discuss the same next time you meet. Don't allow the euphoria of romance colour your perceptions.
If the other person cares and wants to commit to a long-term relationship s/he will and should be more than willing to dispel your concerns.
Take your time and take the decision. Weigh all the pros and cons. Remember it is better to break-off while it hurts less than at a later stage when you are all head on and neck deep into the relationship. While we don't want that to happen, apply yourself to delving deep so that your relationship flowers with nurture and care from both of you and come to a fruition!
First of all, it is not necessary to talk or not to talk with your ex after you leave them and get into another relationship. We must always make it a point that we close the existing chapter and then start with the new one. It is crucial to get over your ex if you are considering to be in a relationship and allow a new individual to enter your life.
If you are soon going to get married or move in together your partner should be aware of your financial status and must know that how much you both are willing to contribute, spend, and save. It is a very serious and sensitive issue, so it should be discussed prior.
I know a relationship is about two people but sometimes some other people also get involved and it is very important to note that everyone is comfortable with everything.
The article was originally written by Namrata Ramkrishnan.
If you have anything to say or add to the list, let us know in the comment section below or you can also write to me at firstname.lastname@example.org.