It's an estimated fact that only 1 in 10 male rape victims reports his experience to the police.
Sexism can happen to anyone, regardless of age, sexual orientation or gender identity. Being a female writer, I frequently come across the cases that portray the ill-treatment women are facing. I feel generous that a huge portion of population fight for the rights of women in India. But somewhere according to me, we forget to realize that even men face such similar issues. The distressing concern is, men now feel they are being unfairly targeted simply for being MALE.
Most of you would agree that we are heading towards a world that may be very hard for men, while some of you may not. But in order to solve the problem of sexism against men, we should first accept that it exists. So, here are some common forms of sexism that men often face.
After the amendment bill passed in 2013, the moment a woman files an FIR (first information report) against a man, the police will arrest him. The investigation occurs later. All a woman has to do to ruin someone's life or reputation or to blackmail someone is fake a few bruises and file an FIR.
If somebody's wife dies of any cause other than a natural death within 7 years of their marriage, a criminal case may be filed against him. And the investigation leads to any kind of proof that soon before her death, she was subjected to cruelty or harassment by him or any of his relatives, the death will be considered a murder for not fulfilling dowry promise or for extracting more money from her family. The punishment for this is 7 years of life imprisonment for him and his relatives.
If a lady goes and files a complaint against her husband or in-laws to a nearby police station, they are ASSUMED GUILTY, till proven innocent. So the burden of proving their innocence lies on the husband/in-laws, else they can very well rot in jail. This section is non-bailable (they have to appear in court and get bail from the judge), non-compoundable (complaint can't be withdrawn) and cognizable (register and investigate the complaint, although in practice most of the time arrest happens before investigation).
Only a man can be proceeded against and punished for adultery (sexual acts between a married person and someone who is not that person's spouse), but the wife cannot be, even as an abettor.
When Jitan Ram Manjh once said, "If both the man and the woman are adults and their relationship is consensual, there is nothing wrong with having an affair. This is a personal choice," the reactions were, "How can he say things like that, he doesn't deserve to live, a pervert CM."
But when a woman said, "I'm a woman and it's my choice to have sex outside marriage," it was called as a statement for Women Empowerment.
Although a majority of women make less than men on the job; men are expected to relocate more often, work longer hours, and to keep a smaller cut of their paycheques for themselves than women due to socially decided portions of obligations such as mortgages, romantic outings, and such.
Chivalry is the biggest instance of sexism against men. Men are expected to open the door for the girl, to pull out her chair. If a girl is seen doing the same for a guy (maybe even because she wants to), the guy is perceived as being haughty, uncaring and possibly even tortures her at home. Going on a date? The guy has to pay, obviously. The girl just needs to come, hang out, waste the guy's money and leave.
There is an explicit bias against the father being awarded custody of children during a divorce, irrespective of considering which is the better parent.
Nursing, child care, primary school teaching, such are the roles that are traditionally reserved for women. Men who enter these roles are often suspected of being homosexual, lacking in masculinity or sometimes even child sex offenders.
Society has told men what they are meant to meet those expectations society has laid out for them and this is a kind of sexism men face today. They are even asked to be shamed or not taken seriously if they do not do so. They even face criticism on what men are 'supposed to be like'. Men should be the ones bringing food to the table. They should be the ones working. Mothers should be with the kids.
Adoptive parents prefer girls, boys wait twice as long to be adopted on average, there are more boys in care than girls. 70–90% of those interested in international adoption would prefer to adopt a girl .
Men are far more likely to find themselves homeless. There is a disproportionate effort tackling homelessness for women than for men. Even the migrant women are accepted into new communities more easily than men.
Women are powerful when they hit a man, but men are monsters when they hit women. Men are expected to do whatever women want them to do in case they might be labeled a sexist. Men are expected to give their life vests to women and children because it's "noble" and "the right thing to do".
It is the social attitude and stereotype mentality about men and their masculinity that whenever a situation comes, they are asked to leave the place before a scene. Once a man was traveling by bus and due to lack of seats, he supported himself with the metal armrest at the rear of the seat on which a woman of around forty was sitting. After a while, the women exclaimed "tere ghar mein Maa behen nahi hai kya?"
The bus conductor tried to calm the passengers and said nothing had happened. He then whispered to man "bhaiya aap utar jao baat badh sakti hai" and swiftly tapped the roof of the bus. The bus stopped and the man was let down.
|It is believed that men are always looking for or willing to engage in sexual activity. Do you remember the scene when an Indian lady rushed into the stadium and kissed the cricketer, Abbas Ali Baig? Well, just for a while if we switch the genders, would that have been an acceptable situation for Indian society?|
Mostly every day we notice cases of women suffering, but now it is time to accept that men too suffer.
I hope you liked the story.
If you have an interesting story to share, please write to me at firstname.lastname@example.org